Smoker Teeth

I went on vacation to Austin the last 2 weeks of July. During that trip, I noticed for the first time that I had brown smoker teeth! What?!? I don't smoke, I don't drink coffee, I rarely drink tea, and I just had my teeth cleaned 6 months ago. They wouldn't get that bad that quick! No. No way. They must be residue from a liquid.

That night, I brushed my teeth harder than normal and checked my teeth. STILL THERE. WHAT THE"? I take out my floss and floss up and down on my teeth real hard. I visualize in my head the brown plaque coming off. And that would have happened had it been plaque. IT DIDN'T WORK!!! F WORD! I'm going to let time pass to see if that fixes it.

Two days ago, I checked my teeth again out of curiosity and (but of course), my teeth near my gums still have brown stains. I was not home, so I pulled out my cellphone and google "brown stains teeth gums" ready to read about some advanced form of gingivitis I have. White knuckling my PDA in fear, I press enter. The FIRST link that pops up:

Andy Wibbels » Crest Pro Health Mouthwash Turning Customers Teeth Brown

Oh. My. Gosh. I use it daily. Bastards. Where's my reparations for damages done? I e-mailed Crest yesterday. This should be good.

But of course, as cheap as I am, I'm not throwing that huge bottle away. I'm using it all first, thanks.

What I learned: Smokers teeth are the new "in" thing"until I run out of this bottle.